Ron and Hermione's top ten wittiest tiffs 罗恩和赫敏的十大有趣的对话

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Ron and Hermione are well known for bickering with each other and their witty back and forth. But who had the upper hand? Today we rank their most memorable tiffs, witty retorts and sardonic comebacks.

罗恩和赫敏是出了名的会互相斗嘴，还会来回说俏皮话。但谁占了上风?今天，我们为大家列出了他们一生中最让人难忘的争吵、机智的反驳和冷嘲冷讽。

10: When Ron demonstrated the art of tact…

10：当罗恩展示他的机智时

Ron Weasley is not someone you would describe as subtle. So, when Hermione tried to delicately raise the rather awkward topic of whether their friend Hagrid might be the heir of Slytherin, his response was very… Ron. It was snarky, witty and in this scenario, he definitely had the upper hand. Well played Weasley.

罗恩·韦斯莱不是那种你会说他很狡猾的人。所以，当赫敏试图巧妙地提出他们的朋友海格是否可能是斯莱特林的继承人这个尴尬的话题时，他的回答非常……罗恩。这句话既尖刻又诙谐，在这种情况下，他绝对占了上风。打了韦斯莱。

After a long pause, Hermione voiced the knottiest question of all in a hesitant voice: ‘Do you think we should go and ask Hagrid about it all?’

‘That’d be a cheerful visit,’ said Ron. ‘Hello, Hagrid, tell us, have you been setting anything mad and hairy loose in the castle lately?’

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

过了好一会儿，赫敏犹豫地提出了最棘手的问题:“你认为我们应该去问问海格吗?”

“那会是一次愉快的访问。”罗恩说。“你好，海格，告诉我们，你最近有没有在城堡里放什么疯狂的、毛茸茸的东西?””

《哈利波特与密室》

9: When Hermione was not impressed with Ron’s homemade spell…

9：当赫敏对罗恩自制的咒语不感兴趣时

At number nine, we have the first time Ron and Hermione met. We think it’s safe to say that their first impressions of each other were not particularly positive – you certainly wouldn’t imagine they would end up happily married. However, in what could be considered their very first tiff, it was Hermione who came out victorious with a scathing putdown.

这是罗恩和赫敏第一次见面的地方。我们可以肯定地说，他们对彼此的第一印象并不是特别好——你肯定无法想象他们最终会幸福地结婚。然而，在他们的第一次争吵中，赫敏却以一记严厉的批评赢得了胜利。

‘Oh, are you doing magic? Let’s see it, then.’ She sat down. Ron looked taken aback.

‘Er – all right.’

He cleared his throat.

‘Sunshine, daisies, butter mellow, Turn this stupid, fat rat yellow.’

He waved his wand, but nothing happened. Scabbers stayed grey and fast asleep.

‘Are you sure that’s a real spell?’ said the girl. ‘Well, it’s not very good, is it?’

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone

“哦，你在施魔法吗?”那就让我们看看吧。她坐了下来。罗恩看起来很吃惊。

“嗯——好吧。”

他清了清嗓子。

阳光，雏菊，醇香的黄油，把这只又蠢又肥的老鼠变成黄色

他挥了挥魔杖，但什么也没发生。斑斑还是灰色的，睡得很熟。

“你肯定这是真的咒语吗?”女孩说。“哦，不太好，是吗?””

《哈利波特与魔法石》

8: When Ron kept turning the lights off…

8：当罗恩不停地关灯的时候……

Ron had a particular knack for getting on Hermione’s nerves and this moment was no exception. While we do understand Hermione’s frustration (Ron’s constant use of the Deluminator would be infuriating), we still think that it was Ron that managed to have the last word during this round of bickering. Though we do think he was very brave… or foolish to answer back to an already annoyed Hermione.

罗恩有一种使赫敏心烦意乱的特殊本领，此刻也不例外。虽然我们理解赫敏的沮丧心情(罗恩经常使用熄灯器会让人恼火)，但我们仍然认为，在这一轮争吵中，是罗恩说出了最后一句话。不过我们确实认为他很勇敢……也很愚蠢，竟然对已经被惹恼的赫敏顶嘴。

‘Will you stop it!’ she cried on the third evening of Kreacher’s absence, as all light was sucked from the drawing room yet again.

‘Sorry, sorry!’ said Ron, clicking the Deluminator and restoring the lights. ‘I don’t know I’m doing it!’

‘Well, can’t you find something useful to occupy yourself?’

‘What, like reading kids’ stories?’

‘Dumbledore left me this book, Ron –’

‘– and he left me the Deluminator, maybe I’m supposed to use it!’

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

“你别说了行不行!”克利切离开的第三天晚上，客厅里的光线又被吸走了，她喊道。

“对不起,对不起!罗恩说，一摁熄灯器，把灯又点亮了。“我不知道我在做什么!””

“那么，你就不能找点有用的事打发时间吗?””

“什么，比如读儿童故事吗?””

“这本书是邓布利多留给我的，罗恩——”

“——他把熄灯器留给了我，也许我应该用它!””

《哈利波特与死亡圣器》

7: When Wingardium Leviosa was involved…

7：当羽加迪姆勒维奥萨被卷入…

This is one time when Hermione demonstrated that winning a tiff isn’t always about having the snappiest or funniest retort. In fact, proving yourself as a talented witch will do the job for you. Ron may have tried to bait Hermione into failure, but she confidently and capably called his bluff.

这一次，赫敏证明了赢得一场争吵并不总是要有最敏捷或最有趣的反驳。事实上，证明自己是个有才能的女巫就能帮你完成任务。罗恩可能想引诱赫敏失败，但她自信而能干地揭穿了他的虚张声势。

‘Wingardium Leviosa!’ he shouted, waving his long arms like a windmill.

‘You’re saying it wrong,’ Harry heard Hermione snap. ‘It’s Wing- gar-dium Levi-o-sa, make the “gar” nice and long.’

‘You do it, then, if you’re so clever,’ Ron snarled.

Hermione rolled up the sleeves of her gown, flicked her wand and said, ‘Wingardium Leviosa!’

Their feather rose off the desk and hovered about four feet above their heads.

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone

“羽加迪姆勒维奥萨!他喊道，像风车一样挥动着他的长胳膊。

“你说错了。”哈利听见赫敏厉声说。“是Wing- gar-dium Levi-o-sa，把‘gar’说得又长又好听。”

“既然你这么聪明，那就你来吧。”罗恩吼道。

赫敏卷起长袍的袖子，挥了挥魔杖，说道:“羽加迪姆勒维奥萨!”

他们的那根羽毛从桌子上飞起来，飘在他们头顶上方四英尺的地方。

《哈利波特与魔法石》

6: When Ron was planning to do a bit of light reading…

6：当罗恩打算读点轻松的书的时候

We think Ron’s response to Hermione’s hunt for her textbook was brilliant. However, as Ron wasn’t brave enough to say this one within Hermione’s earshot (and face the inevitable consequences), we can’t really rank it any higher than this.

我们认为罗恩对赫敏寻找她的课本的反应是聪明的。然而，由于罗恩没有足够的勇气在赫敏听得到的地方说出这句话(并面对不可避免的后果)，我们真的不能给这句话排名更高了。

‘No,’ said Hermione shortly. ‘Has either of you seen my copy of Numerology and Grammatica?’

‘Oh, yeah, I borrowed it for a bit of bedtime reading,’ said Ron, but very quietly.

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

“不。”赫敏简短地说。“你们谁看见我那本《数字命理学和语法》了吗?””

“哦，对了，我借它来睡觉时用的。”罗恩说，但声音很轻。

《哈利波特与阿兹卡班的囚徒》

5: When Ron discovered Hermione was a girl…

5：当罗恩发现赫敏是个女孩时……

Ron really could be quite dense. Having been close friends with Hermione for the best part of four years, you would think that he may have noticed that she was a girl. But apparently, he had not. So, when he finally had that momentous epiphany, Hermione was there to quickly bring him down a peg or two.

罗恩可能真的很笨。他和赫敏在四年的大部分时间里都是好朋友，你可能会认为他可能已经注意到她是一个女孩。但显然，他没有。所以，当他终于有了那个重大的顿悟时，赫敏就在那里迅速地杀光了他的威风。

But Ron was staring at Hermione as though suddenly seeing her in a whole new light.

‘Hermione, Neville’s right – you are a girl ...’

‘Oh, well spotted,’ she said acidly.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

但是罗恩盯着赫敏，好像突然用全新的眼光看待她了。

“赫敏，纳威说得对——你是个女孩……”

"哦，好漂亮，"她尖刻地说。

《哈利·波特与火焰杯》

4: When Hermione told Ron what the solution to his Yule Ball woes was…

4：当赫敏告诉罗恩圣诞舞会的解决办法时……

When it came to the Yule Ball, Ron really didn’t cover himself in glory. Rather than enjoying himself, or at least being honest about his feelings, he managed to put a dampener on the event for quite a few of the guests. When his insecurity and jealousy led him to pick a fight with Hermione (yet again), we were pleased that she was the winner of this battle. It’s not often that Ron is left completely speechless, but Hermione managed to do just that.

在圣诞舞会上，罗恩并没有让自己获得荣誉。他非但没有自得其乐，至少也没有诚实地说出自己的感受，反而设法给不少客人泼冷水。当他的不安全感和嫉妒导致他和赫敏(又一次)打了一架时，我们很高兴她是这场战斗的胜利者。罗恩完全说不出话来的情况并不多见，但赫敏做到了。

‘Well, if you don’t like it, you know what the solution is, don’t you?’ yelled Hermione; her hair was coming down out of its elegant bun now, and her face was screwed up in anger.

‘Oh yeah?’ Ron yelled back. ‘What’s that?’

‘Next time there’s a ball, ask me before someone else does, and not as a last resort!’

Ron mouthed soundlessly like a goldfish out of water as Hermione turned on her heel and stormed up the girls’ stair- case to bed.

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

“好吧，如果你不喜欢，你知道怎么解决，不是吗?”“赫敏喊道;她的头发从优雅的发髻里散了下来，她的脸因愤怒而扭曲着。

“哦,是吗?”罗恩喊道。“那是什么?”

“下次有舞会的时候，在别人之前先问我，千万不要万不得已!”

罗恩无声无息地说着话，就像一条出水的金鱼。赫敏猛地转过身，怒气冲冲地爬上女生宿舍的楼梯去睡觉了。

《哈利·波特与火焰杯》

3: When Ron asked Hermione an important question…

3：当罗恩问赫敏一个重要的问题时……

It was unusual for Hermione Granger to forget that she was the cleverest witch of her age – but it happened here. When Ron, Hermione and Harry found themselves dealing with the deadly Devil’s Snare, Hermione lost her head entirely. Luckily Ron was there to not so subtly remind her of just exactly who she was. While he possibly could have been a little bit more tactful, it certainly did the job, and he certainly had the upper hand in this instance.

赫敏·格兰杰忘记自己是同龄人中最聪明的女巫，这是很不寻常的——但这发生在这里。当罗恩、赫敏和哈利发现他们正在对付致命的魔鬼网时，赫敏完全失去了理智。幸好罗恩在场，没有那么巧妙地提醒她自己是谁。虽然他本可以更圆滑一点，但这确实起到了作用，而且他在这件事上确实占了上风。

‘Devil’s Snare, Devil’s Snare ... What did Professor Sprout say? It likes the dark and the damp –’

‘So light a fire!’ Harry choked.

‘Yes – of course – but there’s no wood!’ Hermione cried, wringing her hands.

‘HAVE YOU GONE MAD?’ Ron bellowed. ‘ARE YOU A WITCH OR NOT?’

‘Oh, right!’ said Hermione

Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone

“魔鬼网，魔鬼网……斯普劳特教授怎么说?它喜欢黑暗和潮湿——”

“那就生一堆火吧!””哈利窒息。

“是的——当然可以——可是这里没有木柴!”赫敏喊着，扭着双手。

“你疯了吗?””罗恩大声。“你到底是不是女巫?””

“哦,对了!”赫敏说

《哈利波特与魔法石》

2: And Hermione bided her time for the best comeback…

2：赫敏等待着最好的回归……

It’s rare that the ideal opportunity for revenge presents itself – but for Hermione, it did. A good seven years after Ron’s initial putdown, it was Hermione’s turn to put him in his place – and she did so in style. We very much enjoyed that she used a nearly identical comeback and can’t help but think that it may have been deliberate.

复仇的理想机会很少出现——但对赫敏来说，却出现了。罗恩一开始被打倒，整整七年过去了，现在轮到赫敏来纠正他了——她做得很有风度。我们非常欣赏她使用了几乎相同的反击，不禁认为这可能是故意的。

Panting and gasping Harry slowed down, skirting the Willow’s swiping branches, peering through the darkness towards its thick trunk, trying to see the single knot in the bark of the old tree that would paralyse it. Ron and Hermione caught up, Hermione so out of breath she could not speak.

‘How – how’re we going to get in?’ panted Ron. ‘I can – see the place – if we just had Crookshanks again –’

‘Crookshanks?’ wheezed Hermione, bent double, clutching her chest. ‘Are you a wizard, or what?’

‘Oh – right – yeah –’

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

哈利喘着粗气，放慢了速度，避开打人柳嗖嗖扫过的树枝，在黑暗中窥视它粗壮的树干，想看到老树皮上的那个能使它瘫痪的节疤。罗恩和赫敏追了上去，赫敏上气不接下气，说不出话来。

“我们——我们怎么进去呢?””罗恩喘着气说。“我能——看见那个地方——如果克鲁克山还在——”

“克鲁克?赫敏喘着气说，弯下腰，捂着胸口。“你到底是不是巫师?””

“哦——好吧——好吧——”

《哈利波特与死亡圣器》

1: The famous teaspoon incident…

1：著名的茶匙事件……

There could only be one winner in this top ten of Ron and Hermione’s best bickering – and how could it be anything other than this memorable moment? Having delivered a highly perceptive monologue, Hermione clearly didn’t have time for Ron’s nonsense and unleashed the most perfect, and blunt, comeback.

在罗恩和赫敏最佳争吵的前十名中，只可能有一个赢家——怎么会不是这个难忘的时刻呢?赫敏讲了一段独白，显然没有时间听罗恩胡说八道，她用最完美、最直率的方式进行了反击。

A slightly stunned silence greeted the end of this speech, then Ron said, ‘One person can’t feel all that at once, they’d explode.’

‘Just because you’ve got the emotional range of a teaspoon doesn’t mean we all have,’ said Hermione nastily, picking up her quill again.

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

演讲结束后，一片有点震惊的寂静，然后罗恩说:“一个人不可能一下子有这么多感觉，他们会爆炸的。”

“你有一茶匙那么大的情绪范围，并不代表我们都有。”赫敏气急败坏地说，又拿起了羽毛笔。

《哈利·波特与凤凰社》

What do you think about our ranking of Ron and Hermione’s most memorable bickering? Do you agree – or would you choose some different moments?

我们给罗恩和赫敏最难忘的争吵排名，你怎么看?你同意吗?或者你会选择一些不同的时刻?